I love boxes, from the little coloured ones to those huge ones for organising when you move. But how about the small self-created ones that you keep in your head? Great for hiding stuff away that you don’t want to see anymore, and for the things you have no desire to have easy access to. When it starts leaking or breaking apart you can just duct tape it back up and shove it back into the darkness. Even though you know it will leak again. Eventually, and hopefully only when you are ready, you will take that box, unpack it and decide what (if anything) to keep and what is of no more use to you.
How about bigger boxes though? Ever get that feeling of being stuck, with no or less than appealing options, sometimes even like there isn’t enough air. Are you yourself in a box? This can happen for lots of reasons whether circumstances, responsibilities, finances, a choice once made… but in the end it doesn’t matter, what matters is you are in this damn box. But it is the reasons that may stop you from being able to talk about it, not wanting to seem unappreciative or a victim, or to cause anyone to worry. And hell, what would talking about it do anyway?!
Well, how about if I told you that the walls of the box were actually windows? And even the roof was glass, and they had all just got dirty as windows do, from not being noticed for so long. How about cleaning the windows and just having a look at a different view? That’s not being unappreciative, that’s just having a look. If nothing else it will let a little light into the box you are in so it may not feel so small and restrictive. And knowing what might possibly be out there may make you realise you are exactly where you want to be. Also, it doesn’t feel so much like a box anymore, more like maybe a mini conservatory?
Okay, enough of the visuals. This happens. In all areas of life, in all professions, at any stage of life. There is research to prove it too. All we can ever do is make the best decision each time on the information we have at that point. So, by widening our perspective and exploring different viewpoints or possibilities this can only increase our knowledge and therefore help ensure we make as informed a decision as we possibly can do. And hey, each step forward (or sideways or even backwards) brings new viewpoints and thereby more information so our next step is even more well informed and choiceful in the direction you actually may want to go in. Wherever that may be. Even if it is staying exactly where you are, and the only step is to actually acknowledge and appreciate it as the best choice and life for you at the moment.
There is also research to prove that talking helps. But I am not sure you needed me to say that. The problem for most people is the ‘to whom’ and the ‘what’s the point’ thoughts. Others may also have an intuitive gut-type feeling that scares them even when they only, so very carefully, allow their mind to skirt around the possibility about thinking and talking about it. So not surprisingly perhaps that they control it and push it away (back into a little mind box). The fear being that once it’s said, then it’s more real, and they may then have to take responsibility for it, never mind actually doing something about it…
That’s why talking to someone outside of your friends and family circle can seem less risky, as there then needs to be minimal, if any, repercussions on your life if you decide to discontinue and just bury it again. Most coaches offer a free initial session- I know I do- so what have you got to lose?
Rachel is an executive health coach, who utilises Neuro-Linguistic Programming techniques as part of her coaching to help you identify your choices and decide what you really want, to bring clarity to your goals, which is the first step for you achieving any goal. She is a member of the Association of NLP and the Association of Coaching. She is also a Registered Nutritional Therapist (BANT & CNHC), although currently non-practising, and as such understands the Nutritional Therapy journey that you will be taking.